Who are the creepy men that are making it unsafe for your daughter to go solo to a party on campus? We have more than enough data to conclude that the majority of perpetrators aren't "others," they are peers and classmates and ex-boyfriends and friends.Who are the creepy men that are catcalling her or slut-shaming her or intimidating her with their words? They are young men your daughter probably knows and interacts with. I want you to know that I'm not saying all young men are rapists or disrespectful of women -- and I'm certainly not saying that all young men are just hardwired that way.
The cultural indoctrination that I'm speaking of goes something like this: It is a young woman's responsibility to safeguard herself from rape, assault, harassment, stalking and abuse because boys will be boys and some of them just can't help themselves.
Teenagers, (An open letter.) Remember that intimate conversation you had with your son?
Or when you told your son, "A woman's virginity isn't a prize and sleeping with a woman doesn't earn you a point"?
"Be careful with the way you act and the way you dress -- it's easy to get a bad reputation." "That's just the way boys are -- you can't give them any excuse to behave that way towards you." "You need to be safe!
When you dress that way, some people read it as an invitation." "Never go out alone, never walk alone at night, never drink from an open beverage." These are conversations often had by loving parents like you.